A bit of aimless web-surfing led me to stumble across this nugget, a reprint of a 17-year-old Santa Clara Law Review piece that looks at some of the legal underpinnings governing that prime piece of fictional Ancapistan real estate known as Gilligan's Island. Some highlights:
Gilligan on equity compensation and the vagaries of the tax code --
In Episode 13, entitled "Three Million Dollars More or Less," Gilligan wins $ 3 million from Mr. Howell in a golf game. When it comes time to pay, Mr. Howell uses a convoluted explanation of the federal tax laws to convince Gilligan that receiving stock in a (worthless) oil company is better than getting cash
Gilligan on joint-and-several liability --
Finally, in Episode 85, entitled "Court Martial," a radio broadcast informs the castaways that a board of inquiry convened to investigate the loss of the Minnow has found the Skipper guilty of negligence. To prove to the Skipper that he was not at fault, the Professor suggests the castaways reenact the final hours of the storm. Doing so reveals that it was Gilligan's failure to secure the anchor to the boat that caused the sinking. This discovery leads both the Skipper and Gilligan to experience unbearable guilt. Just as things are at the blackest, however, good news arrives: after further study, the board has changed its verdict and concluded that the real cause of the wreck was a faulty weather report that had failed to predict the storm.
Gilligan on Lockean homesteading --
In Episode 16, entitled "Plant You Now, Dig You Later," Gilligan unearths a treasure chest while digging a barbecue pit for Mr. Howell. When Mr. Howell claims that he owns the chest because Gilligan found it while working for him, the Skipper insists that Gilligan is the owner because he discovered it. To settle the matter, a courtroom (complete with a judge's bench, witness stand and an American flag made out of flowers and starfish) is built and a trial held before the Professor (who substitutes one of Mr. Howell's capes for a judge's robe). Following a hard-fought contest, he rules that the chest should be treated like the island's other natural resources and, as such, belongs to all the castaways. Unwilling to share the chest, Mr. Howell immediately buys out the other castaways for $ 500,000. Much to his chagrin, the chest is then opened and found to contain nothing but old cannonballs.
Gilligan on estate planning and moral hazard --
In Episode 74, entitled "Where There's a Will," Mr. Howell rewrites his will to thank the others for their attentions during a recent illness. The new instrument leaves a large bequest to each of the castaways: Ginger receives a diamond mine, the Professor is given a railroad, Mary Ann is promised two plantations and a fleet of cars to travel between her properties, Gilligan is granted an oil well and the Skipper becomes the owner of Denver. Through a series of miscues, Mr. Howell subsequently becomes convinced that the castaways are planning to kill him to collect their inheritances. All is put right, however, when he later learns that the "old bore" they intend to kill is a wild boar to be served at a dinner honoring him for his generosity.
Gilligan on Miranda --
In Episode 27, entitled "New Neighbor Sam," the castaways become terrified after overhearing a group of gangsters. When it turns out that the "voices" are coming from a parrot, the Professor and the Skipper decide to interrogate the bird to learn what else it knows. Jumping to its defense, Gilligan insists that the bird be allowed to speak to an attorney before answering any questions.
Gilligan on discovery --
In Episode 52, entitled "Not Guilty," a crate washes up on the island. Inside are some old newspapers from Honolulu which report that someone aboard the Minnow might be a murderer because each had been shopping in the same store on the same day as Randolph Blake, a man who turned up dead just as the Minnow had set sail from Honolulu. With their imaginations running wild, the Professor proposes that the castaways reenact the scene in the store to determine the killer's identity. To their great relief, doing so proves that the incident had been an accident: slamming the store's door had released the trigger of the spear gun that had killed Blake.
Gilligan on immigration --
In Episode 38, entitled "Beauty Is as Beauty Does," the castaways hold a beauty contest to select Miss Deserted Island. When the others are unable to agree upon a winner from among Ginger, Mary Ann and Mrs. Howell, Gilligan casts the deciding ballot for Gladys, a chimpanzee he had found on the island. His reason for doing so rests on solid legal grounds: as the tournament's only native, Gladys is the sole contestant eligible to win the title.
And finally, in what serves as a disturbingly apt parable for our current times, Gilligan on Liberty vs. Security:
In Episode 83, entitled "Gilligan Goes Gung Ho," the castaways decide they need greater law-and-order. Therefore, they appoint the Skipper to be their sheriff and Gilligan to be his deputy. Adopting a "by-the-book" approach, Gilligan soon has the castaways under arrest. Unfortunately, his zeal costs them one of their best chances to be rescued: while they languish in jail, a rescue plane flies over the island.
Comments